Friday, May 6, 2011

My summer has started... Mwahahaha!

Is has been a while since last time I wrote an entry here, but I didn't find any time to do so, I also reached my record without updating in my deviantart since I created it (for those who don't know my DA http://rifkanoctistemporvm.deviantart.com/).

I was busy with upcoming exams and also the whole Ultravixens thing. I have appeared on the 175th issue of Bizarre Magazine, and I am not sure if I won or didn't win the contest, but I think I could, they didn't publish the winner yet but last time I checked how things were going, before they changed to the new month girls, I was on the first place.

I have also passed all my exams, and I finally...
...I finally learned how to growl =) I still need to improve, but I got the point, it's not that hard when you find the path the air shoud follow from your inside.


This first picture I have shown you, was taken long ago, see the black hair was still recently dyed; not a year ago yet, but around 10 months or 11. I don't know why I didn't post it here before, because I like it a lot. (By Sivali D'Lirium, who else ;] )

Today (well, more than today, NOW) Children of Bodom is playing in Madrid, but I couldn't go to see them, it sucks becaus they are one of my favourite bands, I wake up every morning with their music (at least the last three years). It's hard for me to be awaken without something hard (hmmm, but right now I am thinking about waking up with Awaken (Mustakrakish) xD
At least I passed all my exams successfully, that takes off a little the dissappointment.

Here I leave my favourite song from Children of Bodom

Watching the cunt
But before I'm into worries
I do better think fast
Step beyond the legs
Risk selfdestruction
One more sucker
Wait again
To the wrong turn
To the right direction
Too many fucking gonna turn
Going too fast
When you call me outrageous
As a questioner

No feelings - you destroy me HATE
We're welcome - we're on this show END

What the hell was that?
It's a battle name
Tied down everything long before
Blaming all the suckers
I don't give fuck
Till they're coming down
Where I go
Or he's gonna stop me
And when I hear the voice
So you better take care of me now
Knowing that I've always gotta come back
Till the end of life has arrived

Things happen while I grow
No one to catch my fall
Becoming dull is all I know
Resurrection - friend or a foe
[ Lyrics from: http://www.lyricsmode.com/lyrics/c/children_of_bodom/hellhounds_on_my_trail.html ]
No feelings - you destroy me HATE
We're welcome - we're on this show END

Gone too fast
I'm caring about the truth
So tell me how
Fuck me sideways
I've been loved before right now
After I've been down
Well if you don't need to
Resurrect a shadow of myself

No feelings - you destroy me HATE
We're welcome - we're on this show END

No feelings - you destroy me HATE
We're welcome - we're on this show

Remember me, seventeen
Come on, get you going
Have I told you I would return
Come on, get you going
Gotta get on the way
But the butcher
You're allowed to lie
I disapprove my body
Eat my dinner
You dull stupid role model
Who's about to rock

Everything, Everyone
What's going on before
I can't get you back

Things happen while I grow
No one to catch my fall
Becoming dull is all I know
Resurrection - friend or a foe
Friend or a foe

(I took them from lyricsmode)


I have some upcoming appeareances in a couple of webzines, I wish I could appear in more "paper" magazines, but I can't complain, because 15 months ago I wasn't even a model, and now I am in a good position, among girls who have been aroun 5 years on this. But I just want more metal stuff... anything, merchandise, covers... I love goth and fetish, but I want to feel like I am working while doing this, not just a hobby; I want to do really professional stuff.

Now that I have learned how to growl, it would be amazing if I could start a project by myself, I would need good recording equipment, which I don't have, someone to play the drums and keyboard, and help to the songwriting; I can make up nice melodies, but my lyrics are crap, seriously. But well, this would be really difficult, but I have always liket to have my own projects, it helps a lot while finding the style I really like.

I have dyed my hair red, it looks half red and half reddish black, because it has been almos a year since I last dyed my hair black, and I didn't want to take decoloration, and I don't want to go to the hair saloon; I might get it all the same tone, I don't know hahaha.

Here is a picture my sister took a couple of days ago. This is how I look daily, and this is my current hair color.


Now that I am done with al the exams, and my summer has begun, I want to do lots of things, I just don't know how to organize myself, or which ones to foget about doing. (Which ones do you suggest are best to do?)
Studying physics and math, starting a webcomic, starting a drawings deviantart, writing a book I had on mind for long, learning finnish, designing machines, making my own metal band, playing guitar, playing bass, composing, playing on short alternative films... I have always found stressfull how time goes by so quick you realize at some point you have done nothing... Once, when I was 13, I found myself crying because I thought I was old enough to have done something important in my life. I have that problem, I want to do too much stuff for the time I have, and I want to succeed in all those things, which is impossible.

One thing is for sure: I will try to go to Finland for about a month, but I don't know how to find a family there to stay. Does anyone know how to do so?

Well, I think I have talked enough about myself: Here is another pic from the nun shoot, my favourite =) the rebel newrock nun!!! By Arturo Carrasco and make up by Nataschwarzt.



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